HELP ME

[lauri]

IS THERE ANYONE OUT THERE THAT CAN TELL ME WHAT TO DO IWANT TO KILL MYSELF RIGHT NOW. EVEN THOUGH I HAVE A GREAT AND REWARDING JOB MY FAMILY HATES ME CUZ OF WHAT I HAVE BECOME I WANT TO SLIT MY WRISTS

[WolfM]

Dear Lauri,
If you family hates you because of your involvement with alcohol (and all that entails), look in the phone book and look up Alcoholics Anonymous and tell the person on the other end of the line what you just told us.
If it is not alcohol, look up "Crisis Hotline" or something similar in the phone book and call them and tell them the same thing.
You need some face to face help right now.

[angussdundee]

Dear Lauri, no one here is going to offer you professional advice. All we can do is offer you our experience, strength and hope that you will take on board some of our suggestions and go and seek medical advice as soon as possible. The feelings you are describing are brought about primarily by depression and despair. During your present state of mind, these suicidal thoughts are often easier to hear that your subconscious survival instint that says,"I want to live, and I know that in order to live I need to change".
You should be examined straight away and supervised by a doctor familiar with addiction, preferably certified by AS AM or AAPAA. The doctor should be willing to visit you in your own home. Many communities have a suicide hotline. If yours does not have one then look under mental health service's. Keep a note pad and pens with you as you start to make the calls and write down all the information and numbers that you will be given to help you, you'll never remember half of it in your own head at the moment so WRITE IT DOWN and keep hold of it all for future reference. If you feel it's all to much for you then pocket your pride and ask someone to help you, you'll be surprised how even total strangers will rally round to try to help you in whatever way they can, but you'll have to be honest and level with them if they're to get you the kind of help you really need. So go on then, get ringing now.
God help all of us now.
anguss..

[adailyreprieve]

Lauri,
Thank you for your honesty and courage to reach out. I have tried to kill myself many times. When I would come to from the attempt, I would curse God for not letting me out of the agony of my miserable existence. Fortunately, He did not hold that against me, because when I came to AA I was afraid to go to Him for help. Now I am deeply grateful that I did not die, because the pain drove me to seek help, as your are doing. I am proud of you. Doing what you are doing now, not keeping my thoughts secret, and talking with others, all of this is so important. Please keep sharing with us. You are in my prayers. Please keep me in yours.

[catwoman]

Boy, do I know where you are coming from. So many times I reach for and pour from the bottle. Only............to later regret it and not sleep. Is there a magic pill? I doubt it - there's no pill for weight loss either. I'm by far no where near where I want to be - my weight, my posture, my job (am I doing enough?), my...........whatever..........I know what it's like to feel this way. Sometimes I want to break the bottle I'm pouring from and inflict a major scar on my body. I'm not happy, but don't know what to do. I'm glad there are others. I've felt for a long time that I've had a problem, but am now so tired of it consuming my life..... So many times I feel so alone.............Hang in there and maybe we can help each other..............

[samf]

I needed help from a power greater than me. I couldn't do it on my own.
And not everyone buys that it has to be any certain power...some use Good Orderly Direction for G.O.D.
Some use Group Of Drunks for G.O.D.
Hope you keep coming back.

[adailyreprieve]

I suffered way too long before my denial and pride allowed me to reach out for help. I was near insanity or death. Instead, I am blessed with years of experience staying sober, and, if you will, I?d like to share some of my experience with you.

I found life saving support in Alcoholics Anonymous. When I started going to meetings, I met some kind people who did not judge me, just understood and welcomed me. I am deeply grateful that they were there when I desperately needed them. They?ll be there for you, too. If you have not already done so, you may want to phone your local AA at the number in your phone book, and ask them for help. They can put you in touch with some of us in your area, and they can direct you to local AA meetings.

If you need further help finding an AA meeting, click on this link: www.aa.org? ? and look for
How to find AA meetings.

To get sober, I needed face to face and heart to heart AA meetings. I do not believe there were many personal computers back then, but there is a lot of support for you online now. Search these sites where many of us find support:
Alcoholics Anonymous
Real-time Alcoholics Anonymous Meetings
Alcoholics Anonymous Email Meetings
AA online discussions, chats and e-mail meetings.

Early in AA I was encouraged to read the book Alcoholics Anonymous.? That book has become invaluable to me. You, too, may find it helpful. You can read it online at this site: www.aa.org + AA Book.

Here is a site where you may find some answers for yourself in private: Is A.A. For You?? ?And you may wish to read: Do You Think You're Different?? These are available at www.aa.org.

Let us know how you are doing. You are important to us, because we stay sober by helping others. Thanks for that opportunity.

God bless you.

Joe W.

[ronnE]

IS THERE ANYONE OUT THERE THAT CAN TELL ME WHAT TO DO IWANT TO KILL MYSELF RIGHT NOW. EVEN THOUGH I HAVE A GREAT AND REWARDING JOB MY FAMILY HATES ME CUZ OF WHAT I HAVE BECOME I WANT TO SLIT MY WRISTS

Don't give in to that. We sometimes forget to look at all that's good in our lives, because the bad is
there. I'm frustrated because I have a record and it holds me from a lot of jobs. But I keep going because it's been seven years and that legal statue will give before I do. I say that because I use the same will power
that made me beleive I was stronger than alcohol and kept me hostage, towards my soberity. Don't let anything stop you especially what others think of you. If you beleive in you, and you know the truth about
you then keep moving. The truth can't be denied by none. You've got one life, God gave you to enjoy, do
just that with it! If you wake in the morning and you're angery, mad, and frustated you're living in hell. But
if you awaken feeling good, lively, and looking forward to the day you're in heaven.

[adailyreprieve]

Lauri,

I have been extremly suicidal both before recovery and during recovery. I know how to stay alive and stay sober despite the agony.

Thanks for contacting us. I sincerely respect your courage, asking for help. I lost way too much and suffered way too long before my pride and denial allowed me to reach out for help.

My name is Joe. I am an alcoholic blessed with sobriety in Alcoholics Anonymous for 32 years. That doesn?t entitle me to anything, but it sure gives me a lot of experience staying sober. If I may, I?d like to share some with you.

My sobriety is a daily reprieve based on my spiritual condition. So, in your shoes, I would constantly beg my Higher Power for the strength to recover. I would get to as many meetings as possible and openly and honestly share with others. I would want to be sure I had a great sponsor and be totally honest with him. And, with my sponsor as my guide so that I don?t deceive myself, I would seriously evaluate how I'm doing spiritually and how well I'm living the Steps day by day, concentrating on my First Step to uncover any insidious denial that's hiding there.

If I take that first drink of alcohol, I'd be terribly concerned about not being able to make it back again. I know many who desperately wanted to, but could not. I am convinced I would not, and I know from previous experience that death could not come soon enough if I drink again.

To get sober, I needed face to face and heart to heart AA meetings. I do not believe there were many personal computers back then, but there is a lot of support for you online now. Many of us find support in Alcoholics Anonymous at AA.org. and check out the many recovery chat and e-mail meetings online.

Early in AA I was encouraged to read the book ?Alcoholics Anonymous.? That book has become invaluable to me. You, too, may find it helpful. You can read it online at this site: AA.org. Look for the AA Book.

I hope to hear from you again, Lauri, especially if I can be of any further help to you. Let me know how you are doing. You are important to me, because I stay sober by helping others. Thanks for that opportunity.

God bless you.

Joe W.