MY STORY

[MIKEYBEEF]

Well when I was 8 years old my drunken father would bet me $2.00 that I couldnt drink a 32 oz coors beer and I did and walked my buzzed butt to the store to buy myself some cookies. as time passed when I turned 16 I got hooked on crystal meth for 2 years and to get off it I replaced it with drinking. At 18 I would steal alcohol any chance I got.I would start drinking when I got off work working the grave yard shift even though I knew I was going to bed in a half an hour just so I could feel the buzz. I got married at age 19 to a woman who detested alcohol.So out of respect for I managed to quit for like 2 years.I really wasnt drinking alot back then anyways. Well 3 years later I started buying near beer(o-douls)I told my wife that I just wanted the taste and she was cool with it. I wised up and started pouring out the o-douls and putting real beer in the bottles.This way I could drink in front of her. We got divorced a year later.I think she noticed some changes in my behavoir but I wouldnt drink alot.Mabye 6 beers back then.One day I came home and I told her that I was going outfor a while and she told me,if you do I will be leaving you.And I went out anyways.When I got back home she said."Give me 2 weeks and I will be gone.I accepted with no remorse.During the 2 weeks she had a change of heart and wanted me back.That was a no go because my brother was moving in with me.I stood my ground.And she moved out. So in 93'at age 23 I was single again. I had my little bachelor pad and would drink almost everyday now and have people over at all hours. In 95'at age 25 I lost my job and had to move back home for a while.That lasted 3 years.I kinda cut down on my drinking because I was at home but then I would get a motel for a couple days and go on drunkin benders staggering into lame bars and singing Kareoke like I thought I was somebody. In 1998 I met Vicki at work and we started secretly seeing each other even though she was married.Her husband eventually found out from easedropping in on one of her phone conversations and within 3 months we were living together and she had filed for divorce.She had 2 kids that also lived with us ages 11 and 10. Another six months we got married.The first 6 years we were married,I dont think a day went by that I didnt drink. My wifes a sweetheart but she definately is an enabler. In 2005 I managed to quit for 58 days I cheated on my wife devirginising a friend at work.She didnt want to turn 30 and still be a virgin so I helped her out.Some friend huh?lol.Well threw the grapevine my wife was going to find out so I told her.She was devastated but forgiving so I quit from the guilt and I stumbled conversating with her about drinking.She had asked me.What do you miss about drinking.And I thought and I thought and then I drank.I thought about it so much,that i JUST HAD TO HAVE IT,AND WHEN I TOLD HER THAT i WAS GOING TO DRINK.SHE WAS SO ENABLING TO IT. A light went on in my head and that was it.I had to drink again. On december 24th 2005 I got arrested at my job for stealing money hear and there over a 1 year period out of the cash register.The old grab and palm routine.I was taken to San Diego county jail and was there part of christmas day. My mom bailed me out.I had to do 80 hours of community service and pay back my job 2,000 dollars and pay 800.00 in court costs also im on probation for 3 years. On march 31st 2006 I tried to quit again and lasted for 4 months. I went to a few meetings but all the small talk during the breaks made me uncomfortable. This time I relapsed because I had a new job(I was out of work for 6 months after my arrest.Alot of places did background checks)and felt like I was going out or my mind. Now here we are in January of 2008 and im taking my sobriety one day at a time.Thanks for reading my story.Best wishes and have a sober day.