Celebrating A Birthday

[Eddie]

I need some help on this subject. I am thinking of not celebrating my first birthday, why?

Birthdays were always overlooked in my family as just another day and that we should be thankful for the day we had.
Birthdays were full of promises that were never kept, "If I get you a new bicycle you had better pass the grade your in".
Then when I did there was no new bicycle but an exception that was meant help me change my mind.
Birthdays in my later years were a reason to practice my alcoholism.

My biggest concern is that if I celebrate my first birthday that I will be complacent in my approach to the 12 Steps and the whole AA program I now believe in.

The bottom line is that my home group acknowleges me but I don't feel any friendship towards the other group members. Yes I am self-centered but my home group is an old established group and I don't think a 1 year birthday means anything to me or my home group. I know deep down in my heart that this perception is probably false but I don't feel good about celebrating.

I am ok with not celebrating my birthday as I feel it would be better to celebrate 5 years as that would mark a real milestone.

I celebrate my sobriety everyday by thanking GOD for my day and that I am sober. It may sound bizzar but I thank GOD for being an alcoholic and for the fullness of my life. So I really don't see the need to make a celebration out of it.

I am open to opinions.

[Eddie]

Thank-you Carol and Tinker

I knew if I posted a question I would get an answer that made sense and that I could understand. I appreciate the words and I will
celebrate my birthday as I do believe one has to give to receive. I just got into that 1st birthday funk and started to worry. Worry is a classic symptom of someone who is self-centered and I fight the I battle everyday.

In the last year I have learned alot about myself and how AA works. I am still a newcomer as I have a lot to learn.

Thanks Again.

eddie

[fishdocdon]

Eddie,
I have had a birthday problem my whole life. I was born on 12/25 and with a twin brother. I had to realize that group celebrating was NOT just for me. I go through the motions and over time have grown to enjoy the trip. To call it a celebration, even after 15 yrs., is still a strech for me. Tink was right on that newbies are suspect of the 5, 10,15 etc. yrs. Remember, it's what you give not what you get.
GBWU Don

[blossom]

Hi Eddie,

I'm really pleased that you have decided to celebrate your first birthday. I remember when i was coming up to mine and for about 2 weeks before i got really unnerved by it, i think like you said because i didn't want to think - great i've made it! and think my work was done, so to speak. But i have found that just likeTink pointed out, it is important to celebrate our birthdays, it carries a message to the newer members that AA works. I hadn't really thought about it that way until i actually celebrated my first birthday, it turned out to be a very humbling experience for me.

The memories i have of my 1st B'day are so very special and i am incredibly grateful - The lady who 12 stepped me invited me over to her house in the day and made me a lovely lemon tart, which had a candle in it, she also gave me a card and the words she wrote in there made me realise just how far i had come and just how far my drinking ahd took me from anothers perspective (she prayed for me everyday from the day she 12 stepped me to the day i made it to sobriety, which was 12 months later, because she thought i was close to the end), then by chance at the last minute i was asked to fill in and take the chair at my homegroup meeting - which was great to be able to give something back on that day for everything that had been given to me and also by coincidence at that meeting when i came to collect my chip, they had no 1yr ones left, so one of the oldtimers gave me his 1st yr chip, which he had carried around for the 20+yrs he had been sober and what made that even more significant for me was, he was actually the gentleman who answered the very first call i made to AA. I knew from that day, that with God, AA and the people in the fellowship around me that i would be ok and everything would be alright and i still feel like that today!

Thankyou for reminding me of that day, i haven't thought about in a while.

Wishing you a wonderful sober birthday, give yourself a pat on the back and a piece of cake (candles are always optional ;D ) And share your experience, strength and hope with your group, i'm sure it will be greatly appreciated. And just think, we get to wake up the next day and do it all over again :D

Love
Blossom x