pink cloud syndrome

[fishdocdon]

I'm addressing this to anyone who is feeling that life and sobriety are great------without doing the steps with a sponsor. Being dry (sober) can give a great feeling that all is well and one has the world by the tail.
At many meetings, the promises are read. Even though it's explained that they come into our life after step 9, many, being unique, think they see them in their life before steps 4-5, so they become unnecessary for the unique person. Yes but----You don't realize--etc. This is dangerous ground.

If you want sobriety, not just dry, you must do certain things. From the experience of the many AA's who have achieved sobriety they are:
1- Get a Big Book and read it.
2- Get a sponsor and get to doing the steps
3- Keep coming back
Other actions will come in time as you get into the program. There is no "my program" there is only THE PROGRAM, the 12 steps and 12 traditions of AA.

I pray that all will achieve sobriety but it only comes with some effort. As with anything of value, you must earn it.

GBWU ALL Don

[angussdundee]

That's definitely the bottom line Don. And any 'so called sponsor' who tells you that "there's no hurry to do the steps" or "My sponsor hasn't done the steps so why should we" or "the steps are difficult, they take years to do" or "your not well enough to do the steps yet" etc etc etc then get rid of them and move on. Find someone who knows how SIMPLE it is to read the instructions from the AA Big Book.
The steps were designed for sick alcoholics in order to get well so we do not wait until we are well before we do the steps, we DO the steps then we get well.

Anguss.

[angussdundee]

There may or may not be more than one way to do this program, but there's only one way according to the instructions laid out in the Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous and that's the simple way...
"If you have decided you want (note that word 'you') what we have and are willing to go to any length to get it - then you (there it is again) are ready to take certain steps".... Simple... ;)

anguss.

[Carol87]

There may be more than one way to GET SOBER .. but I agree with anguss, the key is in the big book for working the program of Alcoholics Anonymous...

"If you have decided you want (note that word 'you') what we have and are willing to go to any length to get it - then you (there it is again) are ready to take certain steps"....

Speaking from my own experience, although sponsors may not be Gods, I firmly believe they are vital to finding the way to living a sober life that is, in fact, happy, joyous and free. I did this deal for a very long time MY WAY and was nothing but a dry drunk. Once I found the RIGHT sponsor for me, things started to change in my life. Always, whenever I had/have an issue, I was always directed to the steps. And usually had to read and read until I found the answer. It worked for me and still works for me. Does that mean every day is full of sunshine. Of course not, but it does mean that I do have the tools to find that sun!

That's JMHO - it is not necessary that everyone agree. Just sharing my ESH ... which is what this program is all about, right ???

[angussdundee]

It's critically important especialy in early recovery to do your fourth step inventory with a sponsor - spiritual adviser - bleeding decon - member of alcoholics anonymous - call him/her what you will. We very often can't share that stuff with a family member for obvious reasons, so our lives may very well and often does, depend on on a sympathetic member of alcoholics anonymous who freely gives their time to help us because they want to see us get well.
It was made very clear to me by my bleeding decon in the begining, not to even take a cold tablet without consulting him first.
The prime responsibility of ANY AA sponsor, I believe, is to guide his/her sponsee through the twelve step program according to the instructions in the Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous. Becuase if we do it the Big Book way we will have done it the RIGHT way.
Like Carol, "it worked for me and it still works for me".

anguss.

[angussdundee]

???... That's a lot of words Tink, but I'm still not sure what your saying or what your point really is.
"The Bible and Christianity are extreme examples of self will run riot" :-\
"Nowhere in the twelve steps does it say you should quit drinking" :-\

When Dr Bob and Bill W. took alcoholics, who incedentaly had only been sober a couple of weeks through the program, I feel sure that those sick men had not been required to understand the progam before they did it.
So when you say "If it worked for them then that is great, but to tell anyone that it's the only way screams of very serious social and emotional problems" makes me wonder if that's why so many people go round the ragged rock so many times before they finaly search out a sponsor - bleeding decon - or a good old fasioned alcoholic to guide them through this SIMPLE program?
Understanding comes with the practice of the steps not beforehand. So I say don't wait untill you understand the steps, just do them, understanding comes later.
You may "not be sure if anything is critically important in early sobriety" or not, But I'm sure of one fact as far as I'm concerned - there is no other way for me to get well. Thank God for the people who kept it simple for me who told me to sit down, shut up and listen, and who showed me the importance of - sponsor, program, home group and to keep coming back.



anguss. (JMHO) ;)

[angussdundee]

Thanks for trying to clear that up for me Tink. Your so right, Sit down, shut up and listen is a bit strong for some sensitive souls but, just like how Bob and Bill did their program - it worked for me. My drinking was degrading or unecessary too but untill I did sit down, shut up and listen it would have continued till the cows came home.

Thanks for being here. :-*

anguss.

[angussdundee]

By the way Tink. If you "consider yourself a Christian in part", then what part might that be?

Just curious.... ;D

anguss.

[angussdundee]

Please forgive me if I have offended anyone by my posts, recent or in the past. I would be mortified if I had knowingly "run anyone out of here". I thought there was a little bit of banter and humour going on there but it would appear that I have overstepped the mark and I apologise to anyone who has found my posts to be rude or resentfull. Sorry.

Oops... :-[

anguss.

[fishdocdon]

I'm glad to see somne discussion. Now don't take this too seriously, but I find it interesting when you say You've had YOUR GROUP FOR 4 YRS. WITH NO ONE DROPPING OUT. Iv'e never run across any group for anything , in my 69 yrs.,with that kind of attendance record. I'd say your record should be reported to GUENNES. sp. Tink , I love ur posts, but u happen to be a little deep for me . Keep on keeping on. GBWU Don

[angussdundee]

Well Tink, sometimes an apology isn't accepted graciously, it may as in this case be rejected outright but that's ok.
If a person is unwilling to forgive and forget we must just learn to live with that. We tried, to the best of our ability at that time and that is all we are asked to do. If it's not enough for the other person then what we have to do is try to live so that we try to avoid inflicting wounds like that again.
My old sponsor used to say this to me if I came across rejection whilst making amends - " it's alright, you did the best you could with the information and the phisical and emotional strength that you had at that time, now don't worry about it".

anguss.

[angussdundee]

I'll make no apologies for doing my best Tink. If that's the best I can do then I feel sure that my God will accept my progress rather than your perfection just for today even if you can't, and I have no wish whatsoever to patronize you about doing 'your best', at this time or any other time. That compasionate advice was directed at me by my sponsor, I was merely quoting his words to me at that time.
So, I'll take his good advice now and I'll not worry about it, and I'll move right along.

All the very best.
anguss.

[fishdocdon]

MEA CULPA, MEA CULPA, MEA CULPA. Iv'e been wrong before and will be again Tink. Get the chip off your shoulder. I wonder if anyone else could be wrong. I love your post even when I don't agree. GBWU Don

EDIT: Excess white space removed by the moderator !! LOL :D

[fishdocdon]

Moderator, I'm sorry for all the white ---I goofed again and will try to not do it in future!!!!!!

PS to my last post----When I was out there I learned that I had the ability to rationalize and justify any of my behaviors. I could DECIEVE myself and believe it. Now after many yrs. in AA I get suspect of My behavior when I start to justify it. I may be right or wrong but justification for me, should not be in the picture.Being human it often is , however.

GBWU Don

[kremjk]

Hi :) I'm jim...I'm an alcoholic 8) I'm sober today by the Grace of God and the program of Alcoholics Anonymous ;D

I was early in recovery when I experienced an elation about being sober and free from the maddness of those last days of heavy drinking. I was pumped. I was excited. And I had a new addiction. I had to find my AA friends immediately after work. We were having sober fun together. We had coffee. We played video games. We rode motorcycles. We camped out together with big bon-fires. And we went to meetings at home and at prisons and treatment centers.

We practiced honesty and openness and keeping commitments and responsibilities. We told the truth on ourselves and trusted each other. We read the books and encouraged each other to keep coming back.

Often I was hurting inside, and frustrated when I was not with my group. I was restless. iritable and discontented unless I could find them and be with them. And when I was with them I was happy...outwardly....Ah.... There it is... reality. I had unresolved problems that I was patching over with the excitement and adrenaline that I got from the fellowship. The PINK CLOUD SYNDROM.
Members in my group called it "Pink Seven" kind of a combo of pink cloud and cloud nine I suppose. Maybe a common period of elation that may occure in a seventh year of recovery...

The good feelings I experienced with my group were genuine. Otherwise I doubt I would have been so dependent upon them. But I had not yet followed the instructions in the Big Book for a thorough 4th and 5th and etc. Thus repetative, unresolved issues that I would deal with in a Spot Check sort of way with my group. I stayed sober and free of the obsession to drink.And I liked my group but much of the rest of life was a continuing struggle.

And then, one day, by God's Grace, it all hit the fan. Not just my fan... The whole group got scattered by a combination of events through our lives.We got set apart from each other and we were led to realize that we depended more on each other than we did upon God. We used each other but not the program.

And all the pink went out of the clouds.

But that was not the end for us. A sober bottom is just as useful as the drunk one was if, as a result, we become willing to follow the instructions. I did. And I am.

My E.S.H. with my pink cloud. It reminds me of this passage from the book...


Now and then a serious drinker, being dry at the moment says, "I don't miss it at all. Feel better. Work better. Having a better time." As ex-problem drinkers, pg.151

pg.152
we smile at such a sally. We know our friend is like a boy whistling in the dark to keep up his spirits. He fools himself. Inwardly he would give anything to take half a dozen drinks and get away with them. He will presently try the old game again, for he isn't happy about his sobriety. He cannot picture life without alcohol. Some day he will be unable to imagine life either with alcohol or without it. Then he will know loneliness such as few do. He will be at the jumping-off place. He will wish for the end.
We have shown how we got out from under. You say, "Yes, I'm willing. But am I to be consigned to a life where I shall be stupid, boring and glum, like some righteous people I see? I know I must get along without liquor, but how can I? Have you a sufficient substitute?"
Yes, there is a substitute and it is vastly more than that. It is a fellowship in Alcoholics Anonymous. There you will find release from care, boredom and worry. Your imagination will be fired. Life will mean something at last. The most satisfactory years of your existence lie ahead. Thus we find the fellowship, and so will you.

Peace, Hope and Love. jim k