Your First Meeting

[Carol87]

At my home group meeting this morning the topic centered around the fellowship, a reading from 'There is a Solution' and what it was like, what happened and what it is like now.? ?Some great shares, many of them talking about their reactions at their first meeting.? ?

That reminded me of my first 12 Step meeting when I swore that no way in hell was anyone going to HUG ME!!? What I will always remember from my first AA meeting includes the LAUGHTER.? ?It was amazing how much fun 'those people' were having!? ?I also vividly remember who was sitting in the front row, where I sat, who chaired that meeting and who asked him but I have no idea what the topic was.? ?And I was so amazed at the number of young people ... of course, EVERYONE is younger than me!? ? ;D? Beyond that, it is a blur ... after all it WAS 19 years ago ... :-X

Unfortunately for much too long, I was around AA but not IN AA.? Today is so different ..? I will stand in your face until you give me a hug!? ?And rare is a meeting when we don't erupt in laugher several times!? ?Today everyone is still much younger than me but I'm so glad they are there ... I have learned from them and often look at them and think 'why didn't I get here at your age?'? ?But,? :-[, I still don't always remember the topic after I get home ... unless, of course, I'm the chair person? ?:o

Your first meeting? ???

[albertawind]

Great post Carol.

My first meeting was about 15 years ago. I also have no idea what the topic was about, but I do remember the faces I saw. I also remember being scared as hell because I was so twisted up inside and didn't know what to expect. I guess in part I expected to see a room full of sorry-looking drunks: Unshaven men with yellowed fingers and beards stinking of vomit and urine, praising the Lord and vowing to never drink again.

What I saw instead was a room full of happy, good-natured men and women. Some were young like myself, some were older, and some were downright ancient. But they were happy, and they laughed, and they patted me on the back and shook my hand. They made me feel welcome and they told me to come back and share with them again.

When I got home I still had a smile on my face. That meeting was a gift from God. For that one hour I felt like a human being - for that one hour I had companions and a sense of belonging. Something I hadn't felt for a long time.

It would be a long time before I felt that way again. Unfortunately I didn't "come back often" as they had suggested. I didn't get a copy of the Big Book and I didn't seek a sponsor. I decided to go my own way - at the time the only path I knew - ethyl alcohol. But that's another story.

Thanks Carol for helping me remember that.

[kremjk]

Marion was AA. She sent her daughter to find some teens to help start an Alateen meeting. Jane asked me to join. I couldn't say no to Jane. I did not feel any need for Alateen and did not consider my parents to be alcoholic. I had grown up in the Harbor Bar counting the drinks and the hours till we finally went home. But that was back when I was too young to stay home alone. As a teen I was relieved to be away from them for those hours. And I had begun drinking myself. So had Jane and the majority of teens who had come to those Alateen meetings.

The Al-Anon sponsor showed us the Twelve Steps, asked us some questions, and soon the meetings died from lack of desperation.

A number of years later, while I was married to Marion's other daughter, Linda, I tried to stop drinking. We were separated, but one day I mentioned to Linda that I was "trying" to quit. She told Marion and not only was Marion an AA but now was also a professional counselor at the local Drug and alcohol center. Marion sent Ding to Twelve step me. I had partied with Ding and Marion knew that.

My first N.A. meeting was at Dings house. The Local Alano club would not allow the "druggies" to have meetings there so they met in homes. I had plenty of excuses why I did not need Narcotics Anonymous and picked up even more ammo at that first meeting where the members argued with each other.

I hit bottom a few years later. Linda and I tried marriage again. We both drank and used as the kids cowered in their bedrooms the way that Linda and I had cowered in ours when our parents had their drunken bouts. Marion was called to help during one nasty fight. I was bleeding from a knife wound. I had backed Linda into the kitchen and defending herself she drew a butcher knife to back me off. I was ten foot tall and bullet proof and grabbed the blade and apparently my hand was not knife proof.
I was bleeding from the back of my head after falling off a bar stool at the Harbor Bar. (I had moved in after my parents moved out.) My knees and elbows were bruised and puffed from falling down over and over again as I walked home from the bar. (I had not heard of crawling.)

When Marion came through the door that night, I had my own knife, and was threatening her daughter while her grandchildren cowered in the bedroom. My shame was deep at that moment and she asked me, "Are you ready for treatment now Jim?" I was sure I was insane and believed that treatment was akin to an asylum. I said "Yes."

I went to my first AA meeting while in that treatment center. But I had not yet found my bottom. I needed to get worse.
Thanks for the topic, Jim k

[CarolD]

:D I really had 2 first meetings!

I was not ready when I went to the furst furst.

I fled from my 1st meeting in horror,..
"OMG..who are these weirdos? I am not this sick!!"


2/3 years later I returned...I was now defeated.
"Hello...I am a drunk and I need help."

All I remember for several months was a banner over the door
"Keep Coming Back It Works"

I did and it has!!.. ;D

[fishdocdon]

I was in a recovery hosp. and don't remember too much of the first 28 days. I found out later that even though I was mobile, my blood pressure was 234/156 and they kept me pretty medicated. Somewhere in that time I had the 20 question drill. On quest . 20 Have you ever been in a hosp, or institution on account of your drinking????? In good faith and all the honesty at my control I replied NO!!!!!!!!!! LATER I PASSED THE EXAM WITH 100%. I was 53 when I gave up sorta, but I never had to go back out BY THE GRACE OF GOD.
GBWU Doc

[mario morales]

Hi. my name is Mario and iam an alcoholic.

I came to my first meeting by the grace of God, because i did not cualify with the requierment of the 3th tradicion.
My friend was stopped by the police and the jugde sent him with a court card that he had to go to AA 6 times.
Then he came to me saying that he was going to give me a botle of tequila for each time that i take his card to AA.
I did not wanted to go. until he made me such an offer. i could not say no, and thas how i got to my first meeting.

I think that by this time. i have reached my bottom.I lived in North Hollywood Park 6 months my mon kicked me out the
house and i had no place to go. I was 21 years of edge then.
I remember doing my friend's court card and drinking 3 of the 6 botles of tequila he gave me. but the other 3 i did not.
Sonthing hapended in those meetings, you were talking of some kind love that i never knew in my live. you were smiling and i
hated that about you guy. because i could not do that when i came to my first meeting.
That was February 10th 1986 and since the my life is good and now i can smile too. thank you all for being here when i came to my first meeting of AA love always.

[fishdocdon]

Hey Mario, keep coming back and sharing . God bless and good luck. Doc

[WolfM]

Dear Freinds,

I hit bottom on December 15, 1987. I instinctively knew to pick up the phone and eventually found someone in AA. She told me I would never have to drink again if I did not want to. At that point I knew nothing about AA or one day at a time. I just knew that at that point in my life, I did not ever want to drink again.
I asked her what I needed to do and she said I needed to go to meetings. So I asked where they were and she told me and I went to my first one the following week on a Monday (at that time there was only one meeting a week). I met someone I had gone to college with years before, and two other people I did not know. I continued to go to meetings for a few more years, every Monday, until they added more meetings and I went to more.
Eventually a got a sponsor and worked the steps for the first time in 1990 or 91. I have since done the 4th and 5th again (followed by the rest), and I continue to work with other alcoholics.
I do not recall the smiling faces that most people remember, but there were only 3 other people at my first meeting, and we were all pretty young in sobriety.
Today I am one of the smiling faces. A smile filled with gratitude.

Thanks for letting me share.
Wolf M