Loners and recovery.

[saved1]

Freedom and peace from the grip of alcoholism has been achieved throughout the world.
Many do not have the same opportunity's or luxuries often taken for granted.
:sad:
For some the only way is thru study of A.A. literature. :eek:
Many do succeed by desire.:85:
*Let no man say it cannot be done. :cool:

*PEACE - a problem for many but obtainable.:D

"We cannot find peace if we are afraid of the windstorms of life."
Elisabeth Kubler-Ross
(Psychiatrist and author of 'On Death and Dying')

My life always seemed so filled with difficulty. I seemed to have more than my fair share of traumas and losses. Why was I always being tested like this? It just didn't seem fair. I was so wrapped up in myself and the unfairness of my difficult life that I couldn't see that each of these harsh experiences had been opportunities for growth. Instead of bemoaning my fate and blaming people or situations for what seemed to me to be the cause of the current difficulty, I never looked at what part I had played in the whole situation, or the lessons I could learn from each of these experiences.

It has often been said that God doesn't give us more than we can cope with. What I realized later, once I'd come into the program, was that each of these experiences had been a unique learning opportunity for me; they were a chance to grow and mature. I had been too stuck in self-pity and blame that I hadn't seen the wonderful gifts that I was being given with each new life experience. When I was able to open myself up fully to the lessons that I could learn from life, I became a whole person. It was then that the promises of the program begin to be fulfilled in my life, and I began to know serenity and peace.:15:

One Day at a Time . . .
I will look for what lesson my Higher Power wants me to learn from life. I am then able to grow and change, and by doing so, I will come to know serenity and peace.
Sharon S.

This is A.A an introduction to the recovery program.
http://www.aa.org/pdf/products/p-1_thisisaa1.pdf

A.A. fact file.
http://www.aa.org/pdf/products/m-24_aafactfile.pdf

*Read:Step One.
http://www.aa.org/twelveandtwelve/en_pdfs/en_step1.pdf
*Read:Tradition One.
http://www.aa.org/twelveandtwelve/en_pdfs/en_tradition1.pdf
*Read:Step two
http://www.aa.org/twelveandtwelve/en_pdfs/en_step2.pdf
*Read:Tradition Two
http://www.aa.org/twelveandtwelve/en_pdfs/en_tradition2.pdf
*Read Step Three.
http://www.aa.org/twelveandtwelve/en_pdfs/en_step3.pdf
*READ Tradition Three.
http://www.aa.org/twelveandtwelve/en_pdfs/en_tradition3.pdf

Steps/Traditions Four thru Twelve.
http://www.aa.org/twelveandtwelve/en_tableofcnt.cfm

*Communication with the General Service Office.* :idea:
http://www.aa.org/lang/en/subpage.cfm?page=26

*The International Journal of A.A.
http://www.aagrapevine.org/

[MajestyJo]

Thankfully, I recognized the fact that I was one of the very sick ones. I had a real thirst. I would go to a meeting and I was like a sponge. Some days I went to 3 meetings if I could get to the meetings at 10 pm.

Three of us graduated from the recovery facility Mary Ellis House, out of 11 girls who started. I was the only one who stayed clean without relapsing for the next five years. Not bragging, but it is something I am grateful for, others did my research for me. All three of us got a year of recovery and the other two relapsed.

One didn't like going to meetings, so if she wouldn't go, my other friend and I would take literature to her and the three of us would have a meeting. We would take the meeting to her, whether she wanted it or not.

She put up with us, but truth be known, if they don't want help, you can't help them.

Right from the first, I felt at home, the only problem was that I felt comfortable in just about any room I went to. I went to NA for identification, loved their literature, but I chose AA, because of my denial. I felt like I qualified for Al-Anon more than anything, yet I always knew I was an addict, some is good, more is better. I used alcohol just the way I did pills, food, and relationships. I have also been to CA and sponsored a couple of girls from there and NA.

Most of the meetings I went to were 12 & 12 discussion meetings, but also went to Big Book and open topic discussion. Seldom went to a speaker meeting unless I was asked to speak. I spoke at a lot of what people call street meetings. The first meeting I shared my story at was the Men's Mission, the first time I chaired was for a 3 month anniversary at a Native centre. Those are gifts that God bestows on you. For many years I was a social person, always out going and though I had poor self-confidence and low self-esteem, I hid it behind a mask. When I came into recovery, I was so introverted and into myself that if I spoke, you couldn't hear me.

Sometimes you may think I am still that way, because I talk about what is going on in my life. I apologize if it sounds negative, it isn't meant to be. It is my world, the one I live in, and if it wasn't for my computer, I would be very isolated. Truthfully, I don't think I would be alive and sober in today if it wasn't for being able to post at another site.

I don't have the memory to quote things chapter and verse. I may know the words but can't always tell you where they are. I did discover though that I had to take the words off the pages and apply them to my life. It is one thing to know them, but another thing to put them into practice. My sponsor always said, "This is a program of practice, practice, practice. If you think you have practised enough, don't stop, practice some more." Those who stop practising generally end up picking up!

I became addicted to service. I had to get a life! I was doing 7 meetings in 6 days, for 7 years and going to 7-10 meetings a week. Because I needed me time, I would go to a meeting out of town, so I could fill up, so I would have something to give away.

Meditation books were so important for me. Since I can get them online, I sometimes forget to pick up my own. I have Courage to Change from Al-Anon, In God's Care by Karen Casey and Homer Pyle, and The Language of Letting Go by Melody Beattie.

I think because I don't get out much, that is why when I go to the mall, my God puts people in my path. Between my swollen feet, 5 types of arthritis, and sleeping disorder, I seldom get out, even on good days. Last winter was a good one, only missed five appointments because of snow.

My God has been very good to me. There are a lot of people much worse off than me. When I forget that, he puts someone in my path to remind me. Generally a man whose face is scared from burns, a guy whose face is very distorted from Bell's Palsey, I had it on both sides and mine hardly shows, except when I am tired.

It may sound like complaining, but I really am not. I just try to share my day with you. It isn't exciting, it isn't full of a lot of activity and yet my sponsor who has fibromyalgia too, says, "I get tired just listening to what you do in a day."

We can sometimes isolate the spirit. That was recently brought to my attention. I got away from doing a lot of meditation because I was on the computer, so had to turn it over and go back to the drawing board to get more balance in my life. Today was not a day of balance! Once I get talking recovery, I have trouble stopping.

[saved1]

Finding a Group :281:

For many of us, finding a support group has been the single most important step we have taken in our recovery. Isolation is one of the most powerful and damaging effects of addiction and abuse. Participating in a support group can begin to reduce that isolation. It doesn’t happen all at once – most of us have learned how to stay isolated even when we are in groups! But it can happen. And it can be a powerful way to experience God’s love and attentiveness to us.

The National Association for Christian Recovery is a network of individuals – not a network of support groups. There are no “NACR Groups”. We do, however, want to assist you in finding a support group that will help you in your recovery and we hope that the material provided here will give you a good start.

A few words of wisdom about committing to participation in a support group:

Try to postpone reaching any conclusions about whether or not a particular group will be helpful until you have attended several meetings of the group. Some people suggest that it takes attending 6-8 times before you can really know whether it’s a good fit. Initial reactions are just too complex to be your only guide about this.

The dynamics of support groups are usually quite different from the dynamics of other kinds of groups (like discussion groups or Bible study groups), so don’t assume you already know the social norms. Plan on it taking some time for you to figure out what is appropriate. It’s okay for this to take time!

There is nothing magical about the support group process – it is a tool, but we have to use the tool. There are things a support cannot do: It cannot do your recovery for you. Only you can do your recovery. But a good support group can offer a safe evironment to try out the new skills you are learning, allow you to learn from the experience, strength and hope of others and support you as you take the next step in your recovery.

Take what works and leave the rest. There will be probably be stuff that is unhelpful in any group. Expect that. It does not mean that group participation is a bad idea for you. Focus on what works. You can take the next step in your own recovery even in less than optimal circumstances.

If there are no written group guidelines which establish confidentiality as an requirement for all group participants, ask questions. You have a right to know the ‘rules of the game’.

Keep coming back! We all have times when it just doesn’t seem like it’s helping. Learn to distrust the inner voice that says “I can’t change” or “I’m not getting it right” or “my problems are so different from everyone elses” or “I’m not getting better fast enough”. It can be hard work sometimes – but you are worth it! You are a precious, lovable, fallable child of God, a unique and irreplaceable treasure! You are worth all the hard work.

CHRISTIAN RESOURCES
The best referrals to groups will come from someone you know who is already a member of a group. If you do not know of any church-based ministries, however, don’t hesitate to start by phoning the larger congregations in your community. Remember that a church which you would not consider attending regularly may nevertheless have a support group ministry which is well suited to your needs.

For a list of distinctively Christian 12 step groups go here
http://www.nacronline.com/christian-twelve-step-networks

SECULAR (Not explicitly Christian) RESOURCES
We encourage you not to dismiss lightly the possibility of finding a secular support group that will be helpful to you. Until recently, of course, finding an explicitly Christian support group was not really a possibility because so few existed. Most Christians in recovery today began their recovery journey in a ‘secular’ support group – and most still find that participation in ‘secular’ support groups is essential to maintaining their recovery!

In many places it will still be impossible to find an appropriate support group that is distinctively Christian in character. You will, however, find Christians in almost any recovery group. In some situations, participation in a secular group may mean tolerating some constraints on what can be said about your faith as part of the group process – try to remember that these constraints serve an important purpose for many people and that you can always supplement your secular group experience with other kinds of Christian fellowship in support of your recovery. It is also true that many Christians who struggle with spiritual abuse issues may find it helpful to begin their recovery in a setting which is completely free of religious connections – getting help in a secular setting does not mean that your recovery is any less Christian!

For a list of “secular” 12 step groups go here
http://www.nacronline.com/twelve-step-fellowships

SELF-HELP CENTERS
Another way to find a support group that fits your situation is to call one of the “Self-help Centers” which have formed in many states. Many have a computerized database of different kinds of groups. Often these Clearinghouses are a function of county Mental Health Associations – call your county government offices if there is no listing here.

For a complete listing of these centers see: Self Help Clearinghouse
http://www.mentalhelp.net/selfhelp/

As you can see there is something for everyone. :idea: recovery has no specific boundaries,:D it is up to you to find to find the right path.:281:

[soberone]

My Home Group A.A. meeting saved my life.. not a single doubt in my mind! working on the steps and a decent sponsor have helped me remain sober and in remission a day at a time! :11:

[saved1]

I've searched,

I've searched the avenues of life, the pristine chapels, the Bowery flophouses.
I've searched the Halls of Justice, on both sides.
I've looked under the leaves and behind the clouds.
I've searched through the rain and pain of forgotten memories, broken promises and shattered dreams.
I've yearned for the answers to all the questions, some as yet unasked.

I've loved,
the earth, the sky, and all the animals, and, I've hated myself!

I've dreamed,
I've dreamed of dancing on moonlight and traveling to the stars.
I've dreamed of worldly delights, while searching through the bars.
I've dreamed of better worlds, with peace and tranquillity.
I've seen the cold shoulder of inhumanity, and, Sometimes I've found it to be mine.

I've been,
I've been in and out of jails, in and out of Hell.
I've been ostracized, penalized, deluded, denuded, and institutionalized.

I've seen,
I've seen the deathly gray pall of time passing uselessly by.
I've seen the fire of a new dawn, when, Through an alcoholics' haze,
I witnessed the birth of a new life, My own!

And now,
I have seen --GOD-- and --MYSELF--,
and,
I am FREE, FREE to be ME
Paul Wilburn

Paul was formerly a Rhodes Scholar at Oxford in England, came to this country to make his living in literature, got into a bottle, made it to the French Quarter, to the Camel Club, to this poem, and SOBRIETY! What a Gift!

*THE FELLOWSHIP OF THOSE WHO BEAR THE MARK OF PAIN
WHO ARE THE MEMBERS OF THIS FELLOWSHIP?

Those who have learned by experience what physical and emotional pain and anguish mean are a community all over the world. They are united by a secret bond. One and all, they know the horrors of suffering to which mankind can be subjected. One and all, they know the longing to be free from pain.

He who has been delivered from pain must not think he is now free again and can live his life just as he did before.

Having come deeply to know pain and anguish, he must help to take a stand against pain and anguish so far as human power can control them, and to bring others the deliverance which he himself has experienced.

Such is the fellowship of those who bear the mark of pain.

One and all we must realize that our existence receives its true meaning only when we experience within ourselves the truth of the saying -- "He who loses his life will find it."

A human being is never a total and permanent stranger to another human being. Man belongs to man.

Whoever is spared personal pain, must feel himself called to help in the diminishment of pain in others.

Whatever kindness a man puts out into the world, works on the thoughts and hearts of his fellow man.

The only way out of today's misery is for people to become worthy of each other's trust.

No ray of sunlight is ever lost, but the green which it wakes into existence needs time to sprout and it is not always granted to the sower to live to see the harvest.

In everyone's life, at some time, our inner fire goes out. It is then burst into flame by an encounter with another human being. We should all be thankful for those people who rekindle the inner spirit.

"The only ones among you who will be really happy are those who will have sought and found how to serve."
Albert Schweitzer

I found these writings of Albert Schweitzer at the Chapman College Library, Orange, CA, displayed on the mezzanine walls of the Schweitzer Memorial Hall. I was in a great deal of confusion and turmoil that day and had wandered into the library to get some data on a project. My God placed me where I needed to be, once again, so that I could remember what My Primary Purpose Is and will Forever Be, and to know that I am not unique in this world, that others have experienced and are experiencing what I myself experience, not only alkies, but all others, even the so called "normies" of the world.
Learning to apply the 12 Steps of Alcoholics Anonymous to my life was like taking dancing lessons. I got tricked (by some girl) into thinking I wanted to learn. In the beginning, I wasn't that damned enthused with it at all, amongst all the confusion and fears that I would appear foolish or stupid (especially in front of that girl). First, I learned to place my feet (take steps) as the instructor told me. As I continued to practice placing my feet in time with the flow of the music and in the proper direction, I suddenly realized that the steps were doing the dancing for me, that I was having fun, I was enjoying it, and I was out there dancing for dear life.

So it was for me in A.A. Jack Daniels, Jim Beam, and Ernest and Julio tricked me into thinking that there might be a better way to dance to life. I tried practicing taking the Steps with my sponsor, learned to practice on my own, and before long the Steps were doing the Dance of Life for me. What a Ball!

And I found, as it is with any other dance, that it was more fun when I had someone to dance with, to be my partner. Today I have partners who dance with me all the time, --My Higher Power!--, and my brothers and sisters in the Fellowship of Alcoholics Anonymous and others throughout the world.

Love and Peace,
Barefoot

(Share-perspectives) See, your not alone. :281:

[MajestyJo]

My home group was at a Woman's Discussion Group on Thursday night. It was my bread and butter. The meeting on Saturday morning was cake and ice cream. I left there on the bus feeling churched and thinking it was Sunday.

It was because of this group of ladies who loved me back to health that I realized that I had to make my God personal. Who was my god? How did I see Him/Her? I had to build a personal relationship.

I realized Quest didn't mean I was Questioning God. I was seeking Him, to find out who God was to me. Every where I went, He was there.

[saved1]

Just recently I had been studying again and these are thoughts that I have put together from my learnings to share with you. The thought train started as I was thinking about one of the happenings that occurred when I was new in the program and clawing my way back from the depths of the Hell I had been living.

My sponsor was trying to explain to me about the steps, especially the 6th and 7th, and how I was going to have to learn to give up all my old ideas of how things should or should not be. Ideas that I had been holding onto in a desperate attempt to maintain an identity. I remarked at one point in our conversation, "Hell, you are trying to eliminate me!!" He very quietly replied, "If we could eliminate YOU, you would have it all!!" Of course, I didn't understand that at the time, but today I do. He was referring to "ego deflation in depth." The continued practice of the Steps has substantially accomplished this and eliminated the old clawing, clinging, scrapping, unloving and unloveable ME, and given me a loving I AM that is so much more than I could ever have imagined at the time.

From the beginning of life we have all been programmed to, as we say, "Look out for Number One." That is still the watch phrase even today in AA. "To Thine Ownself Be True." But what does this mean? It means that I must be diligently attuned to acquiring the teachings of AA, to incorporating the principles and ideals into my way of life, so that I can give away what I have learned, in order that I may keep it. In this respect, we selfishly seek out the lessons we need to learn, and as time progresses we find we learn them best by teaching. This is the basis of the truism that "When the student is ready, the teacher appears, when the teacher is ready, the student appears." We are all learners and we are all teachers.

I know that for years as a drunk, I was constantly defending my ego-image of SELF...a very false image and I knew it, but I was scared ****less to let anyone else know. I had convinced myself that if they ever found out the truth about me, it was all over. It wasn't until I had been in AA for some time, practicing the steps to the best of my ability, that I began to realize that as my ego defense walls came down, life got a lot better, there were less and less war-parties and emotional upsets. From this it came to me that the best defense in all situations was defenselessness...total elimination of the false ego-image of SELF, or as Bill wrote, ego deflation in depth.

Gradually, as I was moving past this old, selfish Number One, in the process of trying to apply the Steps, I found my self going back through a neutral equanimity, that is, my ego defense walls were coming down a brick, a block, a section at a time. And, finally, moving on in the direction toward zero selfish ego-defended image of SELF.

As each brick would work its way loose, the thought would occur "But isn't this a dangerous thing to do? What will happen to me?" We can almost hear our own protests welling up: "Give up myself to a mindless oblivion? Become a zero? No way! Not going to be a hole in a donut!" Reasonable objections. In theory, someone who just "lets go" might fall into a careless, unfeeling, zombie-like state, become an aimless dropout, drifting with the prevailing winds and currents. And we do see that in AA on occasion. They are the moochers, there only to take, never to give, never to share, in abject fear of giving of themselves, afraid that they might lose something, they know not what.

But remember, no one engaged in diligent practice of the Steps of AA relinquishes either moral compass, anchor, or rudder. The early members of AA already have put in place the proven right-minded ethical code, the twelve-fold path of the Steps, proven by their own experiences in the path to recovery. Our Big Book has further grounded us in both the strong, family-based social ethic in the Chapters to Wives and The Family Afterwards and in the deep respect for the natural order of things. Moreover, another foundation for meditative training is the Eleventh Step, where we ask ourselves questions in meditation of how we have missed the mark with our character defects during the day and how we could do better. In the beginning it is hard work, but the fellowship of other members in meetings, live face-to-face, or on the phone or internet, provides a cohesive support group to help us continue on in life a day at a time.

So where I have spoken of the direction toward "zero" it has been as a very temporary and imperfect metaphor. In this context, it always stands for losing only the unfruitful part of the self, our defects of character, not for a totally vacuous personality. The diligent practice of the Steps does not wipe out all personality structure, to leave only a nobody. It spares the pragmatic ego in the original God given sense. It leaves intact all those vital functions that help us manage situations in real life. Indeed, this maturing ego grows increasingly flexible and practical, finding new ways to navigate both life's vicissitudes and the rigors of the Step by Step training process.

Who, then, are the best candidates for this Step by Step training process? Not zeros, as we may perceive ourselves to be when we come to AA, but in reality, persons already tough-minded to begin with. Survivors in the face of total catastrophe and defeat, rebels who will not accept the status quo. In view of what it is that we are setting out to attain by the ego deflation in depth that the process of applying the Steps requires, the psychologist Engler aptly notes: "You have to be somebody before you can be nobody."

Consistent application of the Steps, and in particular the daily review of the 10th Step and the meditation of the 11th Step, is a marvelous agency of personal change. It contributes a distinctive, fourfold, creative encounter that shapes the process of change.

First, it provides a setting of rigorous honesty that soon exposes how much we have been distorted by the I-Me-Mine complex.

Second, in our quiet place, open and free of distractions, as we review each day in meditation, our own insights then disclose how insubstantial and lacking in continuity these distortions really are.

Third, as we interact with our sponsor and other members it provides ways to work off these dysfunctions in daily life practice.

And fourth, it provides a setting amongst our fellows that is intrinsically so much more appealing than the life we had been leading, that the seeker of sobriety tends to stay the course, no matter what happens.

In such dynamic ways do persistent practice and rare insights help shrink the once almighty I, the vulnerable Me, and the intrusive Mine. Not gone entirely. Just reduced to manageable proportions. Just i-me-mine. Something more considerate of the you, the we, the ours, and the rest of the biosphere. Being diminutive, this new i-me-mine carries a very low profile. Smaller and streamlined, it no longer sticks up high to trip the positive functions of the maturing ego. Neither is it windblown by every shifting, hot or cold breeze from the old instinctual, reactive, ego-driven self. Nor will it be overloaded by any attempted distortions imposed by others' guilt-ridden consciences.

In fact, some of its shrinking is only apparent. Look beneath the i-me-mine. There, at its base, we find that its many positive attributes have substantially expanded. Especially does its living taproot, that part of our Higher Power we find deep within ourselves, which is always spared, now probe deeper, grounded in ways that perceive life's deeper rhythms. Now we recall, from the A-B-C's on page 60, that its lower-case letters stand for the a-b-c's of someone revitalized, whose Spirit has been awakened, more actualized, buoyant, and compassionate. Where did the hitherto partisan self of the Me generation go? Into a simpler generic member who belongs to the We generation. To this person, it will seem only natural to celebrate Earth Day every day. Delusional? It hardly feels that way. It seems like a return toward one's original state in the eternal scheme of things.

Still, any member's progress is uneven at best. Backsliding into old reactive habit patterns occurs. Let strong passions arise, and the old italics and capital letters rear back up. We relearn during every such sobering reencounter why so few persons have ever become perfectly evolved, selfless beings. Yet, endured year by patient year, the unfruitful parts of the complex grow smaller, their wasted energies subside sooner, to be put to better use. Each working of the Steps deepens our understanding, leaving less protruding. We are peeling the onion, so to speak.

From these perspectives, the AA approach would seem a glacially slow process of unlearning and personal restructuring. It operates on what seems at times almost a geological time scale. Any novice expecting a permanent quick fix is soon disappointed. The beginning member, it turns out, is first simply learning how to unlearn. Then the receptive process of relearning opens up. As it unfolds on its own, it seems to reconnect the person with what are now new and vital relationships. Yet, they are the ones that have always been there. We are life's ageless, immanent, everyday miracles. We are "The Beloved!!" We are the One we have been waiting for!!

Love and Peace, Barefoot

We are Somebody,
Even with all our hesitancy, backing up and starting over again.

"When you are awake the dream is gone...
When you are Enlightened the 'world of illusion' is gone...
...and the TRUTH will make you FREE."
KEEP COMING BACK!
ONE DAY AT A TIME!

SHARE :281:

[soberone]

My home group was at a Woman's Discussion Group on Thursday night. It was my bread and butter. The meeting on Saturday morning was cake and ice cream. I left there on the bus feeling churched and thinking it was Sunday.

It was because of this group of ladies who loved me back to health that I realized that I had to make my God personal. Who was my god? How did I see Him/Her? I had to build a personal relationship.

I realized Quest didn't mean I was Questioning God. I was seeking Him, to find out who God was to me. Every where I went, He was there.

God is everywhere! he is always with us.. :281:

[saved1]

One thing I noticed when I was first introduced to AA was the fact that there were a few REQUISITES to the success of a 12 Step Program of AA and it working in my life. The first requisite, of course, was that I had to want to learn to not drink, no matter what was or was not happening in my life. It does not matter what I think, feel or believe. The only thing that counts is what I do. If I drink I get drunk, and if I don't drink there is no possible way for me to become inebriated. In my case that is a polite word for "Stand up, fall down, pee in the corner, knee-walking, nose-puking, blacked-out, jailbird drunk."

The next requisite was that I had to learn to be willing to give up ALL of MY OLD IDEAS of how things should or should not be. I wanted to ask "You mean that none my old ideas were no good?". What the "Old-timers" led me to understand was "If we find any of them that are good and they are worth keeping, we will let you know", and "In the mean time don't worry about it, just learn to remain willing to give up all of your old ideas, as we re-examine them in the light of Truth, as you progress in the program, learning to apply the 12 Steps in your life in all your affairs."

The next requisite, if I was going to know any Peace of Mind or Serenity in my life, was that I was going to have to learn to relinquish my judgment about anything and everything that occurs. I would have to learn to rely on the Judgment of My Higher Power to make my decisions for me, in the light of HIS TRUTH. I would have to learn to leave the 3rd Step Decision alone.

Another requisite that I would have learn was to remember who it was that created me and for what purpose. I have to learn to quit trying to create myself. HE has created me for HIS PURPOSE and most of the time I am not going to know what that is until a long way down the line. (I can be standing in the middle of a miracle and I don't know a damned thing is going on, I'm so busy trying to get things sorted out.) I'm going to have to learn to seek a Conscious Contact with the Source of All Power through prayer and meditation.

I am also going to have to learn to give up my insane idea that I am on the face of this earth to be the "Achiever" . I will have to learn that I have been placed on this earth to be "THE ACHIEVEMENT-- GOD'S ACHIEVEMENT" , whatever that is to be, and I most likely will never know what it is that I will be when I grow up.

I received this from Joe Quinn, March 11, 1974, and it opened the door for me, toward that embrace with My Higher Power, My God, to come alive into happy, contented sobriety. Thank You, Joe.

The Touch of the Masters' Hand
It was battered and scarred,
And the auctioneer thought it
hardly worth his while
To waste his time on the old violin,
but he held it up with a smile.
"What am I bid, good people", he cried,
"Who starts the bidding for me?"
"One dollar, one dollar, Do I hear two?"
"Two dollars, who makes it three?"
"Three dollars once, three dollars twice,
going for three",

But, No,
From the room far back a grey bearded man
Came forward and picked up the bow,
Then wiping the dust from the old violin
And tightening up the strings,
He played a melody, pure and sweet
As sweet as the angel sings.

The music ceased and the auctioneer
With a voice that was quiet and low,
Said "What now am I bid for this old violin?"
As he held it aloft with its' bow.
"One thousand, one thousand, Do I hear two?"
"Two thousand, Who makes it three?"
"Three thousand once, three thousand twice,
Going and gone", said he.

The audience cheered,
But some of them cried,
"We just don't understand."
"What changed its' worth?"
Swift came the reply.
"The Touch of the Masters Hand."

And many a man with life out of tune
All battered with bourbon and gin
Is auctioned cheap to a thoughtless crowd
Much like that old violin
A mess of pottage, a glass of wine,
A game and he travels on.
He is going once, he is going twice,
He is going and almost gone.
But the Master comes,
And the foolish crowd never can quite understand,
The worth of a soul and the change that is wrought
By the Touch of the Masters' Hand.

(As Joe quoted it. Author was unknown at the time I put up this page. I have been informed, Aug 1999, that "The Master's Hand" was written by Myra B. Welch)

The way it happened is not all that unusual in A.A. I had showed up for my first speaker meeting. I was a week and a half sober, all spruced up, wearing a clean shirt and a tie, and getting well!. You know how well we get in that first week! I still had a case of the Whips and Jingles, but I was getting well.

There I was in the Friendship Club, sitting in the back row so nobody would see me. This little dried up, disheveled, misfitting clothes little fellow sat down beside me. I kind of scrunched over and out of the corner of mouth, mumbled to the person on the other side, "My God, look at this one, he really needs help."

Much to my chagrin, when it came time to introduce the speaker for the evening, this dried up little fellow was the one who got up and went to the podium. At that time Joe Q. had about 20 years of sobriety. During his pitch something or another got my attention and I started listening. Maybe it was the glitter in his eyes, or the sense of peace and love that emanated from him, I don't know. Anyhow, he ended his pitch with The Touch of the Masters Hand, and it really reached me and I KNEW he had something that I wanted.

You know that I didn't have a lot of courage at that time, and I didn't want anybody to know that I DIDN'T KNOW, so I waited until everybody else had moved away from him, screwed up my courage, and kind of sidled up to him.

He stuck his hand out to me, and asked my name. I blurted out my name, and before I drew another breath said, "I know you've got it, but I don't know what it is you're talking about, this Higher Power thing, can you please define it for me?".

Joe laughed, and with that magnificent grin and eyes full of love said"BOB, FOR THOSE OF US THAT KNOW, NO EXPLANATION IS NECESSARY. FOR THOSE OF YOU WHO DON'T, NO EXPLANATION IS POSSIBLE, AND ONLY A **** FOOL WOULD ATTEMPT TO DEFINE IT. I DON'T PROPOSE TO BE A **** FOOL, BUT I CAN SHOW YOU HOW TO FIND IT FOR YOURSELF!"

With that Joe reached under the podium and pulled out an old wore out copy of the Big Book. He opened it to page 59 and stuck it under my nose and said "This is how you will find it."

I had to look, of course. That's the page the Steps are on. AND THAT'S THE WAY I FOUND IT!!

Joe's simple statement that I've put in capital letters above, but which Joe said to me in the gentlest of voices is what opened up the door so that I could throw out all of my old ideas that I had picked up from the dumping ground of others (and from my infinite wisdom of KNOWING that I'M RIGHT, that KNOW IT ALL attitude). I could now begin anew in a Lifetime of Sobriety. You see, I knew that I was the **** fool, and that I had failed in ALL my definitions. :15:

Today I know that anytime anyone tries to define "Higher Power" to me, he is a **** fool, and whatever it is that he is trying to define, THAT ISN'T IT. This "Higher Power", My Boss that I work for today, handles things a whole lot bigger and more complex and more wonderful than any human being or group of human beings can even begin to define. All I really KNOW is, "IT LOVES ME and I LOVE IT." :87:

Thanks again, Joe
Love and Peace, Barefoot
(SHARE-EXPERIENCE):281:

[saved1]

When I ask you to listen to me and you start giving me advice, you have not done what I asked.

When I ask you to listen to me and you begin to tell me why I shouldn't feel the way I do, you are trampling on my feelings.

When I ask you to listen to me and you feel you have to do something to solve my problem, you have failed me, strange as that may seem.

LISTEN! All I asked was that you listen, not to talk or do, just hear me!

Advice is cheap, 25 cents will get me both Dear Abby and Billy Graham in the same newspaper.

I can do for myself, I am not helpless maybe discouraged and faltering, but not helpless.

When you do something for me that I can and need to do for myself, you contribute to my fear and inadequacy.

But when you accept as a simple fact that I do feel what I feel, no matter how irrational, then I can quit trying to convince you and get on about the business of understanding what's behind my irrational feeling. When that's clear, the answers are obvious and I don't need advice.

Irrational feelings make more sense when we understand what's behind them.

Perhaps that's why Prayer works, sometimes, for some people, because GOD is mute, and doesn't give advice and try to fix things. GOD just listens!

I already know the Spiritual Truth that the solution to all my problems lies within.

So, if I do hear GOD, it is a still, small voice from within myself, which, if I will but listen to it, gives me the answers that I am seeking.

Please just listen and hear me.

And if you want to talk, wait a minute for your turn and I'll listen to you.

Author Anonymous
(SHARE):281:

[Pythonpappy]

Hey Saved1, ...

I loved your 12-29 post on Ego ... (it's been a crazy week and now I'm back home where I can do a daily followup, Lord willing)

You posted an excellent article on 'self' and the aim to re-align ourselves with life, using truth and reality and of course our Higher Power hidden deep within ... getting rid of the old self and developing self anew, the person we wish to be ...

I recommend everyone to re-read it if they get the chance!!!

Thanks and God Bless,:42:
Pappy

[saved1]

Resources to get you started or continue your journey toward recovery. :D

What Are The Twelve Steps Of Recovery? :17:
(Basic principle per step summaries.)
See how the 12 step recovery plans can alter your whole life, regardless of whether you think you have any addictions to resolve.
The basic twelve steps to recovery followed by members of Alcoholics Anonymous and other recovery groups can help you in your whole life and not just with any addictions you may have. :15:

The first step is "We admitted we were powerless over alcohol (substitute your own word or phrase here), that our lives had become unmanageable." Anything in our lives can become unmanageable, from our anger to how we handle stress. So consider what you need help with and replace the word alcohol with your own.

The second step is "We came to believe that a Power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity." The idea here is that we cannot make manageable whatever is out of control. Once you accept that something is unmanageable by you alone, working this step becomes easier.

The third step is "Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God, as we understood Him." No need to see this as a traditional god. You could believe in the earth or Goddesses, whatever works for you. The idea, again, is that you are not in control of the situation and your spirituality must be.

The fourth step is "Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves." Look deep in yourself to see what is wrong and go from there.

The fifth step is "Admitted to God, (as you understand Him) to ourselves and to another human being the exact nature of our wrongs." Admitting your wrongs is difficult so don't push yourself with this step.

The sixth step is "Were entirely ready to have God remove all these defects of character." Again, you are relinquishing your control here.

The seventh step is "Humbly asked Him to remove our shortcomings." Surrendering even more with this step.

The eighth step is "Made a list of all persons we had harmed and became willing to make amends to them all." This is important in gaining your life back and removing any guilt you may have.

The ninth step is "Made direct amends to such people wherever possible, except when to do so would injure them or others." Directly speaking with people when you can also helps overcome your bad feelings about what you have done wrong.

The tenth step is "Continued to take personal inventory and when we were wrong promptly admitted it." Having the courage to look at yourself closely and realize your faults is an important part of being humble and working the steps.

The eleventh step is "Sought through prayer and meditation to improve our conscious contact with God, as we understood Him, praying only for knowledge of His will for us and the power to carry that out." Praying to your Higher Power helps alleviate stress of believing you are in control of the universe and can fix anything and everything.

The last step is "Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these Steps, we tried to carry this message to others, and to practice these principles in all our affairs." Once you feel you have completed these steps for whatever problem is bothering you in life, carry the power of what you learned, into the world and be amazed at how other people gain the courage to change their lives too.

These worksheets are available in Microsoft Word format, Rich Text Format (RTF), PDF format or Excel format in some cases. In line with the 12 traditions, these worksheets are free to download and use for your recovery in any way that you please as long as you do not sell them. The hope is that you will use them yourself and pass them on to others in need.
http://www.12step.org/tools/step-worksheets/12steporg-worksheets.html

The Twelve and Twelve Book. (STEP BOOK)
*Read:Step One.
http://www.aa.org/twelveandtwelve/en_pdfs/en_step1.pdf
*Read:Tradition One.
http://www.aa.org/twelveandtwelve/en...tradition1.pdf
*Read:Step two
http://www.aa.org/twelveandtwelve/en_pdfs/en_step2.pdf
*Read:Tradition Two
http://www.aa.org/twelveandtwelve/en...tradition2.pdf
*Read Step Three.
http://www.aa.org/twelveandtwelve/en_pdfs/en_step3.pdf
*READ Tradition Three.
http://www.aa.org/twelveandtwelve/en...tradition3.pdf

Steps/Traditions Four thru Twelve.
http://www.aa.org/twelveandtwelve/en_tableofcnt.cfm

For Those who prefer the big book.

STEPS by the BIG BOOK. http://www.aa.org/bigbookonline/
study guide is for those in recovery from the disease of addiction
who wish to work the 12 Steps by the Big Book, Alcoholics Anonymous
http://www.stepsbybigbook.net/show_docs.php?Type_ID=1

Need Additional Help? *Communication with the General Service Office.* :281:
http://www.aa.org/lang/en/subpage.cfm?page=26

[saved1]

The NY Times recently published an absolute knockout of an editorial by David Brooks, entitled “Bill Wilson’s Gospel” (SHARE) by David Zahl on Jun 29, 2010

In a culture that generally celebrates empowerment and self-esteem, A.A. begins with disempowerment. The goal is to get people to gain control over their lives, but it all begins with an act of surrender and an admission of weakness.

In a culture that thinks of itself as individualistic, A.A. relies on fellowship. The general idea is that people aren’t really captains of their own ship. Successful members become deeply intertwined with one another — learning, sharing, suffering and mentoring one another. Individual repair is a social effort.

In a world in which gurus try to carefully design and impose their ideas, Wilson surrendered control. He wrote down the famous steps and foundations, but A.A. allows each local group to form, adapt and innovate. There is less quality control. Some groups and leaders are great; some are terrible. But it also means that A.A. is decentralized, innovative and dynamic


A.A. is the example par excellence of Grace, in fact: those who recover in the program recognize, sometimes early on and sometimes much, much later, that recovery is solely on account of the utterly unmerited Grace of God. “The best efforts” of human beings – either the alcoholic or those who’d tried to help her – had no effect on the problem; it’s not until people let go – till we surrender all control – that we are able to recover. It is a left-handed process entirely: great power unleashed in the midst of – and, in fact, by means of - pain and weakness.

The anchoring effect makes for a particularly terrific addition to our ongoing catalog of human fallibility. But it’s the humility of the man himself which makes the deepest impression:
[Kahenman and his partner Amos Tversky] had a rule of thumb, [Kahneman] explains: they would study no specific example of human idiocy or irrationality unless they first detected it in themselves. “People thought we were studying stupidity,” says Kahneman. “But we were not. We were studying ourselves.” Kahneman has a phrase to describe what they did: “Ironic research.”

I realized that one of A.A.’s singular features – one of the things that make it different from religion as it’s usually practiced – is that it’s an open-ended process. There is no ultimate “goal”; there’s no particular endline that, once having crossed it, you can say that you’ve definitively “arrived.” There aren’t any particular “metrics” – which means that there is lots of opportunity for adventure and the chance to continually learn. There is the priceless opportunity to live one’s own life, as it plays out in all its reality, under the Grace of God.
:undecided: :162: :281:

[saved1]

Most 12 step groups have some suggested formats for meetings and offer meeting documents. Below is a list of links to meeting documents or information about meeting formats for different types of recovery groups.:281:

A.A. Meeting (Hyannis Original)
Format for Alcoholics Anonymous Meetings
Crystal Meth
Dual Recovery
Overeaters Anonymous Group Secretary Materials
National Association for Christian Recovery
Alanon Meeting Format - from Knoxville, TN group
The Basic Big Book Step Study Meeting Format
Debtors Anonymous - PDF file
Survivors of Incest Anonymous - Doc format
Integrating the 12 Steps into Addiction Therapy - Excerpts on Google Books
Social Phobics Anonymous
http://www.12step.org/references/meeting-documents.html

[saved1]

Test your knowledge. To know is to understand. Do you really understand?

This Quiz: Money
http://quiz.christiansunite.com/The_Book_of_Proverbs/Money.shtml

This Quiz: Alcohol
http://quiz.christiansunite.com/The_Book_of_Proverbs/Alcohol.shtml

This Quiz: Fools
http://quiz.christiansunite.com/The_Book_of_Proverbs/Fools.shtml

The above quiz's usually go hand in hand. Some do well and some don't.
If your one of the many dont's in the world, perhaps some of the the answers can be found here http://www.biblegateway.com/versions/New-International-Version-NIV-Bible/
1660
Sometimes the truest answers, come from unlikely sources.:281: